Seating

Seven years ago I wrote a series on the good conditions for a good social dancing experience (in the milonga). For one reason or another I didn't publish them. I was reminded of one of the posts - seating - while in a salsa bar last night, from where I messaged my Colombian friend:

I asked a friend who had danced salsa in Europe if no seating was the same there.  Pretty much, she said, so maybe it is a European thing.

Most tango dancers realise that, given the significance attached to invitation by look, not to mention basic social awareness and courtesy, you never stand in front of anyone sitting down. But in the local salsa bar my view was often of the jegging-clad buttocks of other women. Salsa culture, for all that it's fun, seems to be one where the idea is to be out there and proud and for attire specifically not to leave much to the imagination.

The two banquettes were covered with coats and bags. The table held an assortment of hastily placed drinks. At the other end of the long room the only other table was occupied by an elderly man watching, surrounded by more coat mountains. Neither of them were places to get dances, and indeed I didn't, much, dancing only with a couple of guys I already knew and one I realised too late, who seemed drunk or stoned.  He literally seized me as I made my way to the bathroom. Why I didn't import my milonga behaviour to manage that situation better, I don't know.  Maybe I thought I already looked distant enough to most of the guys without visibly disengaging myself and causing a scene. But salsa tracks can be long, five long minutes or more.  Sometimes you're just a beginner and new on a scene again.  Later I watched, amused, and learned anew a long-familiar lesson, as a self-possessed girl turned down his walk-up invitation. 

Kami was right. Not having a chair and a table for your drink is uncivilized. So is a sticky floor.  So is the behaviour of some guys.  Some uncivilized characteristics congregate.  But it's free, and it's local and there's sometimes a vibe and you cannae always have it all. 

No judgement on other women who danced all night. But personally I just can't bring myself to hang about on the edge of the dance floor in clear sight of guys looking for dances.  I sought refuge in chat with a tall French-African non-dancer with a reassuring presence who liked to listen to the music and watch his friends dance. 

The girls get their dances light heartedly but if I were to do it that way it would feel too much like prostitution.