A response to "Why do men learn to dance tango from each other in some cultures but not others?"

Palestinian Dabke: Sarah Canbel via Wikimedia Commons

A: There's a question that's been puzzling me. Why some male tango dancers up until the 1960s at least, and even today, will dance with each other to learn the dance, but men from the eastern side of the Mediterranean seem much more reluctant. It strikes me there are so many shared elements in the cultures and yet there is this difference. Do you have any dances where men dance together?

B: Oh yes, totally, the traditional dances in the area like 'Dabkeh' are danced by men together

I think the Argentinian and Middle Eastern cultures may seem alike but not really, I'd say the culture in Argentina is closer to Italy or Greece more than the Middle East

I think it's because tango is an intimate dance and for us sharing an intimate dance with another dude is not a very comfortable. I believe this applies to all men actually (straight ones at least). From what I remember reading once is that men used to dance tango together not because they liked it , but in order to improve their skills so that when they have the chance to dance with a lady they'd be able to impress her. Because back in the day there were more women than men in Buenos Aires as it was an up and coming industrial area.

A: Thank you! So dancing Dabkeh with guys is ok because it's a "all guys together" dance about being manly & not a couple dance normally between members of the opposite sex?

B: Something like that, but it's [?not] about manliness, it's just the local traditional dance that is danced in celebrations like weddings and stuff , and sometime women participate but the members hold hands but nothing more

A: So now guys don't have to find ways of dancing better because they can usually get dances as there's often more women than men; basically less competition & women are easy to get?

B: Well it's not about competition, not anymore at least , but yes, guys don't have to dance with each other to learn or improve their skills, you just go to classes and/or milongas and dance with women, who are also learning and improving their skills. I think it's just how things evolved to be , it's not sexist or anything if you are worried about that 😄 a least not for most guys.

A: No, I'm just curious why guys there danced together but guys on your side of the Mediterranean, plus another friend with a more traditional cultural background seem to be really against it. And plenty of European guys to be fair, but probably proportionally fewer.

So if there was that same imbalance there was back in the day in Argentina do you think more guys might dance together to get better?

B: Oh yes, absolutely, I think that imbalance was the main reason why guys danced tango together, otherwise why would they?

Also I don't know if you know this information , that back in the day if a guy wanted to learn tango they had to follow for a couple of years before being taught to lead, which eventually lead to young men being discouraged and driven away from tango into other forms of dancing where they can meet girls

A: I'd heard the first part but not the second. So if there was that imbalance today what do you think would happen?

B: I think guys would dance with each other again 😆 I think it's a simple matter of necessity and trying to find solutions

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A: How logical!