 |
| Wallpaper flare |
A lot of guys don't like women who do adornments in dance. Years ago, a "top" local female dancer, asked to dance with me and it was like dancing with soap, there was no 'us', it was all so that she could exhibit. She later became a teacher.
I asked a friend the other night what he thought about adornments and he likes them. These things are a matter of taste. His pet peeve was women who anticipate his move. With him, I don't "speak" in the dance because I don't feel the need or desire.
But I have stopped dancing with experienced guys who feel to me too controlling. It sets off a warning light though when a guy says he doesn't like women who "anticipate". It feels like we're being shut down, as if he thinks tango is something where things are done to women, where we can't have a voice, a say, an idea.
Some guys even test you in dance. They provoke you to anticipate. It can feel fun at first, a game, but not if you start to realise he is doing it to put you in your place, to assert his dominance.
*
A muchos hombres no les gusta que las mujeres hagan adornos en el baile. Hace años, una bailarina local "top" pidió bailar conmigo y fue como bailar con jabón. No había "nosotros", todo era para que ella se exhibiera. Más tarde se convirtió en profesora.
La noche pasada le pregunté a un amigo qué opinaba de los adornos femeninos y a él le gustan. Cada cual con su gusto. Lo que más le molestaba al bailar era que las mujeres se anticiparon a sus movimientos. Con él, no "hablo" en el baile. No uso tanto mi “voz de baile”, porque no siento la necesidad ni el deseo.
Pero dejé de bailar con hombres experimentados que me parecen demasiado controladores. Sin embargo, cuando un hombre dice que no le gustan las mujeres que "se anticipan", se me enciende una luz de alarma. Parece que se nos está silenciando, como si el tango fuera un lugar donde a las mujeres les hacen hacer cosas, como si no tuviéramos ni voz ni voto.
Algunos hombres incluso te ponen a prueba en el baile. Te provoca para que te anticipes. En un primer momento puede parecer divertido, un juego, pero no si te das cuenta que lo hace para ponerte en tu lugar, para afirmar su dominio.
Estoy muy agradecida a Ale por su ayuda con la traducción. Cualquier error restante es sólo mío.
I would argue that the meaning of "anticipation" is more narrow. For me, it isn't when a follower informs the just-about-to-be-executed step as a co-creator, perhaps because of her sense of the music or the body dynamics, or perhaps just because of her personality. That wouldn't be the dreaded "anticipation", that would be the division of the creative duties. Sure, if she hogs up everything and leaves me no room, I might feel cheated, used up. But usually, as the musical phrases end, so do the silent agreements about who is primarily in charge. At one of these moments, I'd inevitably try to recapture the control and to play the man-boss strategy. It usually works.
ReplyDeleteThe "bad anticipation" is something else. It's about her making guesses about my intentions, not to express herself but to "please the leader". It was more common when I was an inexperienced leader. My partners were probably like, this must be the step he's trying to lead, in his lame way, and I better fake it and execute it as if the lead was good. More recently, the "guesswork anticipation" is more common when I dance with less experienced followers who are honestly trying to guess which of the relatively few "standard moves" is expected of them. So everything outside of their standard set may be ruined by anticipation. It makes my job as a leader a little harder, both with memorizing the lists of moves-to-avoid and sometimes with repeating the attempts with utmost concentration or even overleading. It still works, but I prefer the silent, complete mutual understanding of the co-creators.
Hi Dmitry, You had me laughing out loud at "I better fake it" :)
DeleteBut all those issues, on his side, or hers are caused by the problem of steps / moves / pasos. If people stopped thinking about steps, stopped thinking completely, in fact, when they're dancing, all of those problems would dissolve.
I love your last line.